The Spiritual Family

19. Developing Family Relationships

Often it's hard to develop meaningful close relationships with people in a large church. Home fellowships provide a perfect setting for this. It is in the small home groups where we learn to communicate intimately and share on a deep spiritual level. We learn to trust each other and believe the best about each other.

Developing a group of believers into a spiritual family is not difficult. The fact of the matter is - we are a family! We just need to recognize the truth. By the precious blood of Jesus we are made children of God, members of His royal family. It is a high position that we are freely given. It is up to us to appropriate it by faith in our lives - individually and corporately. All it takes is faith and perseverance, to stick together "through thick and thin".

Members of a spiritual family should live in harmony. This does not mean there cannot be differences in opinion. However, brothers and sisters will love each other despite their differences. It's an art - to disagree "agreeably." We can admit we have different opinions, but not show resentment to the one we disagree with. When we make Jesus the center of our lives, disagreements will not bother us much. Jesus commanded us to love one another "no matter what." He provides strength for us to do it. Decide for yourself, is Christian love a feeling, or a commitment and a matter of choice?

An example of the "household rules" of the royal family of God is found in Colossians 3:12-15. In this Scripture there is a strategy to help us to be at peace with each other:

1) Imitate Christ's merciful, forgiving Spirit.
2) Let love guide your life.
3) Let the peace of Christ rule in your heart.
4) Always be thankful.

The Apostle Paul left us a beautiful example of relationships of spiritual father with his family of believers. (Acts 20:31,36-38) He loved them, cared for them, even cried over their needs. They responded with love and care for him and sorrow over his leaving. They prayed together and comforted one another. Like Paul, you can build strong relationships with the members of your group. This comes by sharing, caring, sorrowing, rejoicing and praying with them. You encourage people to trust you as a leader by giving of yourself.

Some believers have difficulty being involved meaningfully with others. Because of the hurtful experiences in the past they may refuse to open up or try to hide their needs from others in the group. You, as leader/father of the family, need to rely on the guidance of the Holy Spirit. Be sensitive to their needs. Your patience, and trust, in their ability to open up will help them a lot.

Time spent together in the group can really bond people to each other. In the lessons for the group (leader's guide part) you will find some tips on creating different, meaningful, gatherings (agape meals, communion service, half-night prayer meeting etc.).

Family is a place where we learn to love no matter what.

1. Why should you believe the best about a "bad" person? (1 Cor. 13:7)

2. How can you love "no matter what"? (1 Cor 13:4-5)

3. In what manner should members of the spiritual family speak to each other? (Eph. 4:29; 5:4)

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